So this will be a strange post. As this week is winding down and I get closer and closer to coming home I have been thinking about the last 6 months and my time in Afghanistan. When the day is hectic and I get frustrated and angry with some of the stuff that I have to put up with, I can't wait to get out of here. A break, a vacation, whatever. It is beyond time and the fact that TIA, as I often here, (this is Afghanistan) just makes it worse.
However, sitting out on my porch or others rooftops as in tonight, I think to myself never have I felt more appreciated in what I do or more at home in a job. It is weird, let me tell you. For the 6 weeks I am home I will really miss this place. What they tell me is that it gets in your blood. What I can tell you all that what gets in your blood is not the dust, not the food, but the fact that these people really need us here. For once in my life I think I am really making a difference somewhere. While, I can tell you stories about making a difference in the life of people throughout my current career, now that I am here, somehow that seems very insignificant.
A great story is the difference between my day class and evening class. The day class is all made up of typical college age freshman with typical freshman attitudes. In fact about 1/3 of them are Afghan Americans who have returned for various reasons. So they are really the typical first year college students. Although, I can say that several of them grasp everything with gusto and do well, many of them like their American counterparts are there because someone tells them they should be. On the contrast though, is my night class. Any night class at any University are largely adult students. Adult students, throughout the world, have a different attitude and true appreciation for the gift that has been bestowed on them to continue their education, no matter where that gift comes from. I know, I was one of them, who returned at a later age to complete my college education therefore can relate first hand that experience. However, Afghan adult students are different. Albeit a young age for some of them, they can still remember times in Afghanistan under the Taliban, where education was not the norm. It was limited to the elite. They really truly appreciate the opportunities they now have. That is different for me. They really devour learning. That is take it in and digest it and appreciate it for the strength that it gives them in their future success.
Each semester is sad, I must say. Although I will see some of these students for quite some time to come, for many of them it will be the last one on one type relationship that I will have with them. Like a mother hen turning out their chicks to the great big wide world of education, a relationship that was developed over a period of time is now over. Wednesday night was the last night for my evening class. One student stood up and gave a speech that if I had written it, I could have not done much better. He talked about how he had learned from the class and how he had appreciated everything we had gone through. Most specifically he talked of my role in the class, not as the "sage on the stage" as we call it in education, or preacher as I refer to it often but as the coach, the leader that had brought them through this great journey that they had gone through as a class. For those of you that know me well, you know I am a pretty stoic guy. At 6'6", 275 lbs, a pretty intimidating figure that often has been characterized as showing little or no emotion. His speech though, WOW. It almost brought this big guy to tears. As I have said, I have been doing this 8 semesters now. Never in those 8 semesters have the students go it, like the students in Afghanistan. True, I have taught mostly college Freshman of traditional age, and as such it sometimes takes a bit to sink in and for them to truly appreciate an experience, never do I think they get it quite so much. Needless to say it was a very AHA moment and one that almost brought this big ol' guy to his knees. I emphasize ALMOST.
I am talking with a guy from D.C. that did a year in Afghanistan. He can't quite put a pin on what got in his blood but he is dying to return. I think I have it. It is these AHA moments and the moments in which you know that you and the work you do are truly appreciated. I mean really truly appreciated. I have had so many "thank you for what you do" statements in the last 6 months. My goodness. From students, which I truly appreciate, to fellow faculty/staff members, to really a first, Board of Trustee members, I can tell you they are no less than once a week. I cannot emphasize to you enough how rewarding this job is.
Monday night, I told you about our Memorial Day BBQ. Tonight we had kind of a send off for many of us leaving, and/or, such as me, going on a bit of a holiday, as the Brits say. Both nights I sat back, looked up at the beautiful sky, breathed some great clean air, and thought to myself, David, this is what you have always worked for. This could really be home. Now the next morning, as we faced the crazy traffic, the blowing dust in the middle of the afternoon, the crappy food, the inconveniences of life here, and all the frustrations that accompany being here, I say to myself, boy you must have had a little too much fun last night, but no matter who I am with or what I am doing, it still comes back to me. This is the single most rewarding decision that I have ever made in my entire life. Maybe this really could be home. That statement may get me labeled crazy, or even anger my closest friends and family, while personally I miss you all and never stop thinking of my return to you, I can tell you that at the end of the day it feels really good to be here.
Now who knows where I will be at mentally a year from now. Who knows even what will happen in Afghanistan. Or who knows even at the University where it is rotation time and we will have a new Pres., Vice President, and many new faces. . They talk of troop surges, increased incidents of attacks, etc. etc. Who knows, what even what life will be like in Kabul, May 31, 2010 when I am at the end of my contract. Finally, me personally, I have always been a builder. One who likes to create things from the ground up, to build them inch by inch. I have been doing so, and from the comments I get, doing a great job. However, someone often calls me a rolling stone. When I start gathering moss, I roll on. This is somewhat true. I get bored and start looking. So next year I question if I have the same remarks or will be sitting in the I can't wait to get the heck out of here seat. But for now, although I miss most of you dearly, I am happy, happy, happy with where life has led me.
See you all in a while...........
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